God R U There? Do U Hate Me?

[anaconda19]

i dont know how to explain exactly what ive been thinking recently, im kind of in a hard place in my life and pretty dazed and confused right now. i feel like ive missed something or not learnt something that keeps everyone else going, i feel lost, i dont know what to think its all so hard sometimes.

ok so recently ive come across the term 'god fearing' i take this to mean not only believe in god and love him like normal reliegous people do like i thought is being religous just to believe, but also to fear him and live like your afraid of him and go church and pray etc. actively being owned by god rather than what i had the idea of as living in his world and just believing an being grateful to him, god fearing made me feel it was more meant like he was in charge and your supposed to bow down and recognise him... know what i mean? i heard this phrase and wondered if thats whats missing in my life, is thats whats wrong with me that i dont have god in my life? am i trying to live while fighting against the current? is it because i dont have a god or a religion or bow down to anyone in my life that i dont feel complete or good and that my body wont heal and stop hurting and everything goes wrong?

i watched a film and one part was one guy explaining to another that 'theres a hole in everyones life, heart, and body and only jesus can fill it for you, that no amound of sex, drugs and ''tom-foolishness'?' can fill the hole, eventually everyone has to accept god into theyre lives and ask for his help and forgiveness'.... it went something like that and i wondered about it it seemed to make a point, ive been tryin to blank out my missery, maybe i should be asking god to help me its one of the few things i havent tried? ive tried so many things to help myself heal but i cant stop hurting meds dont help, operations dont help, random alternative therapies suck etc im lost at what to do next to help myself. i want to run away and hide but i cant hide from pain in my own body.

my lifes general opinion has been that god isnt real, and if he is hes a cunt, an he abandoned us a long time ago, ive felt this because when i was forced to read the bible years back i felt there were many man made parts and things that helped men(sexist) and would not be written by a god(unfairness etc) in my opinion and i felt religions were there to control the masses in a way and generally make people feel a bit better... an i felt hes a cunt cos if he is real and hes all powerfull etc, why does he let so much bullshit go on on earth 9/11, wars, rape, torture, starvation, etc... but thats a whole other story... so i really dont believe in god, even though some of my family do and other people do, so should i try to? if i should believe in god is it enough just to do as the other believers do and learn to be a good bible basher or will god know i dont believe it for real if i go to a church on sundays an do all the other shit too? if i listen enough will i eventually believe?

i have been doing some deep thinking about myself and my mess of a life recently, due to having a lot of time on my hands, this is becaus of a bad accident i had and the injuries sustained and the operations after it to rectify the mess and the ongoing pain since i had the accident on a skiing holiday. ive been hurting a long time now, unemployed, poor, lonley and miiserable and my whole life ive been against god and religion, my whole life ive felt alone and outcasted a bit and like god is this whole man made 'plot' an nothing real, and so many people are offended by my opinion of this, and i wonder if its because ive not accepted god or whatever you do that i cant make my life ok again and help my fucking body to heal and stop this pain?

it been going on so long now, its destroyng me feeling so shit and being in agony all the time, i dont know how to feel ok about being in pain, three years of pain, and i have been getting really low about it all an life in general, i feel like ive gone from bein young an having my whole life planned out and going the way i want it too and working hard towards it, to being a young adult and life meaning to be good but it going from worse to worse and spending every minute of my day hurting, waking up in pain spending all day in pain then attempting to sleep in pain and being unable to or sidetracked everytime i try to pick my life back up and get a new start and sort things out. sometimes i wonder what ive done to deserve it, and i think hard about it an i really havent been a bad person, and part of me wonders is there a god, am i being punished by him for something? if i learnt to beg for fogriveness from somewhere will i be able to heal will god stop me hurting?

i can see this sounds a bit paranoid, yes in a way it is being paranoid wondering if a god that doesnt exhist is angry at me, but im not asking this in a freaking out paranoid way im asking cos i wondering what u all think and suggest i think about it all, cos so many people do believe i wonder if im being a fool not believeing or what? whats going on?

do u get what im trying to ask here? sorry if i make no sense at all here i cant claim to be under the limit....

someone help me clear this up

thanks

Edited March 12, 2010 by anaconda19

[~nobody~]

The way I see it, if you genuinely feel that a hole in your life is filled by accepting the existence of god then fill your boots. I don't think there's a right and wrong as such with this one. If it works for you (in the sense of helping you make sense of your existence) and you don't use it to justify any discrimination against any other person or their beliefs then it's alright with me.

e2a I should perhaps point out that I'm an atheist, and so don't believe that you're being punished by an angry god, but that's just my opinion. If you have genuine faith then I don't think reason comes into it, anymore than it does with things like karma or astrology.

Edited March 12, 2010 by OG refugee #24601

[HvyFuel]

I think it refers to the fear of not being accepted into heaven rather than the fear of the deity.

[mallsy]

im a firm believer in god, and i think/have came to the conclusion that everything happens for a reason, destruction, death etc happens as a test mayb not for the person involved but for others around them, some people live there life solely for the church, others dont, personally i go to church 1/2 times a year but live my life a particularly way closely mirroring karma, prayingeveryday and never ever sayin oh my g** ever! as this in the bible is seen as the ultimate insult! alot of church goers live there lives on the outside perfectly but really there judgemental (havent seen you in church in a month/year etc), jealous etc etc. which is not the teachings of jesus although the 10 comandments r listed 1 to 10 from my own reading they are all of the same seriousness, having god in your life is up to you, it may not help you now or it could change your life! a personal experience that did it for me was a couple of years ago ,i was unemployed, starving, massively depressed,struggling with addiction, really down and out, i had an epiphany late one night and realy prayed hard, after that night things seemed to slowly come back 2gether, if i didnt have money for food, thered b a text or a knock at the door, comin round our's for t and a bifta etc things arent always gr8 nw but i guess thats life! and the idea of burning for eternity doesnt realy appeal to me! only you can decide m8! gd luck with whatever you decide!

[mallsy]

The way I see it, if you genuinely feel that a hole in your life is filled by accepting the existence of god then fill your boots. I don't think there's a right and wrong as such with this one. If it works for you (in the sense of helping you make sense of your existence) and you don't use it to justify any discrimination against any other person or their beliefs then it's alright with me.

e2a I should perhaps point out that I'm an atheist, and so don't believe that you're being punished by an angry god, but that's just my opinion. If you have genuine faith then I don't think reason comes into it, anymore than it does with things like karma or astrology.

[Archangel]

Pilgrimage and pilgrims on the spiritual journey might be what you need.

You mention God as "He" like hes a species of being with a female counterpart or A sexual which is how life basicly works which is interesting. Its a maths equation. 1+1=2 or a new 1.

Male + female = spawn... Water+seed+soil+Light+gas = plant.

Dust/debris + water/ice + gas + gravity + star = This planet. Its all a maths and physics equation mate, part from the soul which is explained at sites most people here tend to laugh at.

im not going to voice my version of reality that keeps me sane but it basicly follows an understanding of what we know about this and nature.

Heres what we know about the universe.

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rest withnailed cause im but i feel your mental and physical pain from that post, all i can do is wish it better...

Edited March 12, 2010 by Archangel

[weed_G]

“Life is suffering.”

Buddha quotes (Hindu Prince Gautama Siddharta, the founder of Buddhism, 563-483 B.C.)

“To become a spectator of one's own life is to escape the suffering of life.”

Oscar Wilde quotes (Irish Poet, Novelist, Dramatist and Critic, 1854-1900)

“Out of suffering have emerged the strongest souls; the most massive characters are seared with scars.”

Kahlil Gibran quotes (Lebanese born American philosophical Essayist, Novelist and Poet. 1883-1931)

“This indeed is a safe refuge, it is the refuge supreme. It is the refuge whereby one is freed from all suffering.”

Buddha quotes (Hindu Prince Gautama Siddharta, the founder of Buddhism, 563-483 B.C.)

[ratdog]

I want what you`re smoking tonight Archie

[slicker]

the search for meaning in life is the BIG question.

so your struggling with that!

your supposed to.

according to Richard Dawkins and other athiests there is no God.

he is just a product of our imagination, created by us to make ourselves feel better and solve the problems you are having.

when i was younger i traveled the world looking for an answer to the questions you are asking.

but in specific terms the 'god fearing' thing is a bit of outdated theology.

if god made us why would he bother if he didnt love us.

i capture some of gods feeling in the feelings i have for my children

i love them no matter what and would do anything to see them happy (according to christians, jesus died on the cross for his children, thats us)

my current beliefs were formed by my contact with Hindu mystics.

not the ganga smoking sadhu's but the Gurus of which there are many fakes.

Baba Ram Dass wrote a book called "be here now" about his experiences when he meet his guru, Neem Karoli Baba.

if you want an answer to your questions "Does god exist?" "What is he really like?" then go out and look for yourself.

there is someone out there who can give you the answer. he may be Hindu, Christian, Muslim, Buddist or one of the many other spiritual groups.

my one bit of advice for any spiritual journey is "let your heart be your guide".

your mind wont get you there on its own. look for a direct experience of God.

my guru used to say that its healthy to question everything

never accept anything on blind faith

believe only what you experience yourself.

[ratdog]

your supposed to.

How do you know this?

[weed_G]

what I want to know is where did all that stuff in archies video come from ...anyone who says 'the big bang' is getting reported

Edited March 12, 2010 by weed_G

[~nobody~]

the big bang

sorry (j/k btw, not meant to be a smart arse answer, well not a serious one anyhow)

Apologies for going OT and/or trivialising the thread Ana.

Edited March 13, 2010 by OG refugee #24601

[weed_G]

:: ..now I dont want 40 replies sayin 'the big bang' ..this is annas thread

[Archangel]

what I want to know is where did all that stuff in archies video come from ...anyone who says 'the big bang' is getting reported

You and 7 billion Evolved mammals on this planet and countless other beings on others...

Think real hard about it and....

pop goes the weasel

Edited March 13, 2010 by Archangel

[Underwater]

your supposed to.

How do you know this?

I'm up for hearing the answer to that.